I’ve said this many, many times but I will say it once more. God always does exceedingly, abundantly more than I could even imagine.
Today, Feb 25th is my 2nd wedding anniversary and let me tell you… this 2nd time around is VERY different.
When you’re married as younger people without children you have time. You have uninterrupted time to get to know your partner. You figure out each others nuances and habits, likes and dislikes, moods and non-negotiables, even taste in television shows. You discover these things in a vacuum of time where it is you two against the world. Time is irrelevant and you both can fully enjoy one another apart from distractions. God’s original plan is perfect in every way.
My husband and I walked through some pretty treacherous storms to get to where we both found ourselves 5 years ago. The lives we’d known were forever destroyed. We separately mourned the deaths of our relationships, our families, our dreams, our plans and I KNOW we both felt as if that devastation would last forever.
God saw fit to work in each of our hearts.
In my heart God healed and restored parts of me that broke pretty badly. When I’d meet my husband a year after my heart was broken there was a wall that he’d have to get through, and calluses that had set in that weren’t ready to be softened. But God.
God used our brokenness to speak to the other’s heart. God used the ugliest parts of our lives to display a beauty I never knew could exist. HE restored and grew a love unlike any other I had experienced. A love of a lifetime. God did work ALL things (broken hearts, fractured dreams, mangled lives) for good, for HIS glory for two people that loved HIM.
We don’t get to have uninterrupted time to get to know each other, we jumped right into the thick of it holding hands ready and willing to face what life would throw at a couple who have been together 19+ years. But we didn’t have 19 years worth of experiences to draw on. We didn’t have 19+ years of inside jokes to get us through the really bad moments. We didn’t have 19+ years to relive welcoming our children into this world, or reminiscing about family vacations, or reflecting on an endless amount of memories we’ve made together. We simply didn’t. This second marriage thing, thrusts a couple into a situation where life is already in FULL gear. The beginning of a 2nd marriage is like jumping into a double-dutch jump rope competition that is in full swing! We have had to get to know each other on an intimate level while trying not to trip over the obstacles of life. We’ve learned to distinguish between, what’s really important to figure out, and hash out, and what can wait. We’ve adapted to an array of parenting challenges that neither one of us have been prepared for.
These 2 years have felt like 10. We’ve loved each-other like newlyweds, but lived as a seasoned pair of parents ready to battle the WORLD for the sake of our family. I don’t doubt that we’ve both prayed A LOT during these 2 years, I know we’ve cried, I know we’ve felt helpless and a little beat up, and I know we still have to fight against the ghosts that remain of our past lives. But what I’ve learned is that God is gracious and HIS love endures.
What HE accomplishes daily in my marriage is a testament to HIM who is faithful. My husband and I did not choose an easy path but we chose the path that most honors and glorifies our God, and for that we have been blessed. I am blessed.
I love these past 2 years and the fact that even with all the challenges faced I can still recall amazing moments of love, laughter, peace and joy. Evidence of God’s abundant and never-ending mercy and grace.
I truly found the one my heart loves and it brings me immeasurable joy and pride to be a suitable helper to him.
BTW, we still have NO clue what the heck we’re doing half the time but we are driven by 2 things, our love for God and the love we have for one another.
2 down, and we’ll take as much time as God wants to give us.